I've been looking through your letters again, and the first one I read was dated Nov 23. That goes back to Thanksgiving. I had a swell dinner that day. I guess that we had everything except our loved ones.
You also mentioned the song "No Love - No Nothing". I heard it for the first time today, and it's really a swell song, at least the lyrics are appropriate for us, aren't they? I feel the same was as the mode indicators, I'm all for it, honey, I just don't feel any other way.
By the way, I received the Birthday Card. It was so damn cute! I got a big kick out of it. Love is grand, darling, and I'm glad I'm in love with you, sweet you, regardless of the torture involved while we're apart. It's worth it, that's what I say, anyone as nice as you, Terry.
I also received the Christmas Message. Oh darling, I do wish I could get home for Christmas, to spend it with you, it would be perfect. And the gifts, darling, they were simply grand. You'll never know how much I'll cherish that little picture of you and your mom and dad. It's really a wonderful gift. And the scarf, darling, is so damn nice. I wore it today and some how I felt that you were near.
All of it was wonderful, sweetheart, you couldn't imagine how much excitement you caused. My pilot got impatient when I didn't open the packages fast enough for him.
The candy and cake are gone already, the wolves were at it. They said to thank you, and they all wanted to meet you. "Did you say she knitted that scarf?" and I said, "yes, how do you like it." They said, "is that her picture?" "By God, Jim, you've always been lucky, look at who you've got waiting for you." "I'd sure like to meet her!" I said "it wouldn't do any good, you couldn't get any place unless over my dead body." And they said "not a bad idea."
I haven't played the record. I'm going to have it played tonight, I'm waiting anxiously to hear it. And when you told me you were in bed with the flu, I must have worried because later something happened that made me think you were desperately ill.
I had an awfully high fever a few days ago. In fact, I've lost all track of things that happened these last few days. All I can remember is that I was home, couldn't wait to see you. But you weren't home, you were in the hospital, and when I went to the hospital, they wouldn't let me see you. They wouldn't let anyone see you. Then I said, "look I love her, she's my wife" but there was no record of our wedding, and it was too bad, but that's how things are. I was going crazy. I couldn't convince them that we were sweethearts, very much in love, that I just had to see you. When I woke up, I was still sweating, not sure that it wasn't true - and then I knew how I would feel if I lost you. It was as if they were pulling my heart out bodily. I couldn't stand to see you slipping away, while I was too far away to see you, to hold you in my arms, to kiss you.
Darling, I love you so. I hope nothing happens to you, but if anything ever does, let me know right away, and if there's any possible way to get home to you, I'll be there, at your side.
I hope you're feeling better now. That damn flu really pulls a person down. You don't know whether you're here or there, and you don't care much.
Darling, when you talk about our happy life together, children and a wonderful home, our love, our hardships and joys, together - it seems so glorious, so beautiful. All the times I thought I was in love, I know I was wrong now. I'll tell you why I know I've never been in love, really in love I mean. When I think of you, I not only think of a woman, a loveable, sweet, adoring person, but I also connect you with all the things so precious in life, things I mentioned alone. Suffering as one, so happy as one, so very much in love with each other. I picture the fights, we're going to have, those little misunderstandings that arise between people so very fond of each other, and then we'd make up again, and every thing would be forgotten, and we'd be happier than we'd ever been. I'd picture our first meeting after I came back, so gloriously happy, looking into each other's eyes, wondering, each of us, whether anything had changed things. Oh, my darling, you're so sweet, don't ever be any other way, stay as wonderful as you are.
I played the record just now, went over to the club and opened up the phonograph, it was swell, really deluxe to hear your voice again. I got such a big kick out of it. To me, you sounded like the sweetest voice in the world. I only regretted that you weren't as near as your voice sounded.
I've got the crew pictures now. Someone just brought them over. I'll be sending them right away. One is for us, that one will be yours. In case I don't get enough envelopes, I'll have to send all pics in one. I'll send them to my mom and I'll label "ours" so you'll know which one to take.
I'm leaving in a few short days. Can't tell you where, but I can tell you that it's in the states. I don't know how long we'll be at our staging station, maybe a week. Maybe more, maybe less, but I'll write as soon as I get there and let you know how things are.
Darling Terry, please forgive me for not writing more often. I know how I feel when I don't hear from you, but I try to make it up by a little longer letter. I know you understand, and I'll try very hard to write more often here after, or break my arm trying,
I'm going to say so long now, sweetheart, and please get better, get rid of that damn flu, and don't go to work until you feel tip top again.
I'll always love you Terry, remember that, won't you? Until next time, I'll be thinking of you always.
Your loving sweetheart,
Always,
Jim
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