October 1943

Dearest Terry,

I got the news today - got sort of stopped in a way, mainly, because I was so absorbed in my plans for us. I should have expected, should have stopped to consider.

Anyway, it's as I told you before, whatever you say is "wilco" with me.

I won't say that I'm sorry, darling, because I'm not. I felt that it would be as easy as that, I loved you, knew that you loved me - did the thing I thought was right.

I cancelled the apartment and told the chaplain how it was - so now it's you and I, still, if not in marriage, something just as good - our promise to each other. Yes, sweetheart, let's just be engaged for now. You don't think that I'd give up first because I couldn't have my way, do you?

Terry, sweet, do me a favor, (do us a favor), don't come down. It's obvious that if we were to see each other again, that we wouldn't be held responsible - it would be hard for both of us to take. We're not kidding ourselves. You know what the results would be. It would be so damn difficult, almost unbearable, to part - why not leave things as they are, eh?

Incidentally, as I started to write, I thought of our bottle of Scotch I had saved for our wedding. I just now opened it - took a whiff - it smelled so good - a toast to us, may we always be happy - together!!

Sweetheart, what your dad says is true, we hardly know each other. Maybe we're assuming a lot about each other, and maybe we're wrong in our assumptions. But, love doesn't work that way - it's either there, or it isn't. One doesn't teach himself or herself to love someone, they just feel it, they know it!

What he says about the long trip is absolutely, fool proof - Forgive me for not being considerate enough to think about that - that's all I can say.

Now that we've decided to wait - God knows that I'll wait for ever - He knows because I've told him - we can be glad that we've done what was best for all concerned.

I guess it will all work out - correction: I know it will! If your mind is at ease now, I'm glad, after all, your welfare is my happiness. I wouldn't want you to conflict with your folks. They mean a lot to you, and you mean a lot to them. So now we're all happy, well - as happy as can be expected under the circumstances.

I don't know how to say this, I realize how you feel, and I know how I feel. But, as you gathered from my last letter, I want you to go out and enjoy yourself - I don't want you to hibernate. If, at any time, you meet someone, someone who means something - hell, I don't know how to say it - I can't say it! I love you too much to lose you. Naturally,if anything does happen, it'll happen and no one can be blamed, no one will be responsible - it'll just happen - and I'll be praying that it won't. What I'm driving at is that I don't want to feel that I'm tying you down. It all seems up to the fact that I want you to be happy.

Darling, we can only hope, and have faith in our love. A lot of things can happen before I see you again, some of them good, others, not so good. We will be happy - we will!

I received the rosary and the candy. The candy was good, and the rosary was one of the nicest things I've ever received. Maybe the one who sent it had something to do with it!

I've been flying quite a bit lately - I'm not one to complain, but after five or six hours at 28,000 feet and then finish the day off with ground school, it really leaves me ready to sleep for a week, but it's the same thing the next day, and the next. Sometimes we just look forward to nothing but bad weather so we won't have to fly. It has to be this way though, there's so much to be done before the crews are really ready.

I can see why the boys keep on the way they do. They have hopes of fulfilling plans similar to ours we have.

Darling, I don't mind telling you that it's going to seem like a long time before we see each other. I'm going to miss you more and more as time goes on. I love you so - there's no one like you. I'm so proud of you - I've been bragging about the sweetest girl I know. I adore you darling.

All my love,

Jim